A Festive Month: My 37th Birthday

Good day, Lovely Friends!

 

May is my birthday month. Last year, I made a week long celebration for Hubby's birthday in Orctober (read the post here) because I wanted to comfort him after the death of his two aunts only two weeks from each other. This year, my birthday fell on Monday, and Michael was ill, so we didn't do anything special dor the day. Still, I got a surprise at work. Once I reached my desk, there were no one to be seen, and I was wondering "Where's everybody?"; when my coworkers and team showed up from the pantry singing a cheerful "Happy birthday!" Turned out that they cooperated with Reception, so they knew exactly the moment I stepped from the parking lot to the elevator to reach my floor. Thank you! It was such a nice surprise!

 

 

 

I received lots and lots of birthday presents. Here were some of them. My coworkers know that I love anything Hello Kitty, so most of the birthday gifts were Hello Kittythemed. I might have turned 37, but I'm still a little girl at heart, and Hello Kitty always puts a smile on my face. Thank you! Ow, even my sister in law gave me something Hello Kitty, though she was ten years younger than me. Haha! I also got some cute accessories, beauty products, decorative pieces from my favorite store, and several high-quality leather purses that my Mom got from her Italy trip to Milan. I am so blessed!

 

 

Unlike last year, I didn't invite my team to lunch this time (read the post of last year's birthday week here), because Michael was ill. Everyday during my birthday week, I went home to check on him during lunch time, and I also left the office at five o-clock on the dot, so there was no way I could spare some time for birthday lunch or dinner with my team. That's a pity, but Michael holds a higher priority than any birthday celebration!

 

May is also the birthday month of my mom in law, as well as Hubby's younger brother's girlfriend, Maria. Hubby had an idea to combine all the three birthdays together and invited his family for early dinner and watch the sunset at Bandar Jakarta. Bandar Jakarta is a seaside restaurant by the Jakarta Bay that serves fresh seafood and it's one of our favorite place (read the post about watching sunset by the sea at Bandar Jakarta here). Michael has never seen the beach so we want to give him the experience. Unfortunately, Hubby's sister could not make it on the supposed Saturday, so we canceled the event and instead, Hubby proposed that we have sort of afternoon tea on Sunday by inviting them to our home to celebrate. Have you ever had combined birthday party like this when there are more than one birthday girl? How do you like it? Do you plan to do it again?

 

For the afternoon tea party, we ordered  a picnic roll with ham, cheese and egg as savory treat. My mom in law will bring Gateau Africa - an old fashioned chocolate cream cake, which is the only cake that I like - as the sweet treat. We also provide salty and chocolate kind of crackers for nibblings, as well as fried vermicelli - replacing noodles that signifies long life - so we got plenty to eat!

 

This is the neighborhood place where we ordered picnic roll. I'm not a fan of cake nor sweet treats - unless it's chocolate -, but I couldn't resist taking pictures of all these gorgeous cakes. They are real work of arts! And what's better, you can eat this work of art. Haha!

 

 

 

I got this cart as a parcel gift container several years ago, and over the years it has been serving us well. It was used as a babywalker, toy selling cart toy or train by my son, and several times used as a drink and snack station in numerous events as shown here. I saw an exact piece just liket his, sold at Informa - a big furniture chain store - for thirty bucks, and here it is came to my home for absolutely free!

 

 

This is the delicious picnic roll. I also ordered this for my birthday last year, because it's super delicious! Unfortunately, I was so busy being hostess as well as looking out for Michael that I didn't snap any pictures of the lovely birthday cake nor the happy festivities! *sigh* The event lasted from 2 pm to 5 pm and everybody had such a good time. Again, I have been entertaining people at my home since I was in college in a small apartment, and I have learned that number one rule for being a hostess is no stress. Entertaining needs not to be perfect. Guests would feel awkward being fussed, or if the hostess looked stressed out. They don't care that the table setting is not perfect, they won't mind the mismatched diningware, or that the room is not 100% spick and span. The most important thing is that the hostess enjoys herself, because she sets the whole atmosphere and mood for the party. As long as the hostess can chill and relax and enjoy the party, everyone will enjoy the party.

 

 

I got this festive holiday diningware, consist of two plates and one bowl, for a fraction of the price last year during after Christmas sale. Why two plates and one bowl? Because they were the only ones left, everybody had bought the rest of them! I decided to get them because they are festive yet not Christmasy, hence I can use them all year round for birthdays, auspicious Chinese New Year, Christmas, Valentine's Day, or any other events deemed appropriate for celebrating. In less than a year, they have proven to be good investment, out of the kitchen cupboard multiple times to cheer up our table setting!

 

I don't drink, but Hubby is a wine lover who appreciate great wine, while his family - well, he likes to joke that they would drink any alcoholic beverages and would comment it's either "Good" or "Very good". They are not heavy drinker or anything, mind you, they just drink on special events. So Hubby got three bottles of white wine to chill before the party. Why white wine? Well, because we were supposed to eat seafood at a seaside restaurant, before the change of plan!

 

 

For my birthday present, Hubby wanted to buy me a new Coach bag we saw at the boutique that I really like, but to his surprise, I refused. I told him that I have had enough purses already, especially since Mom just got me some new ones from Milan. What I want this year is not stuff, but experience. I am a Broadway shows and opera lover, I used to watch Broadway shows during my years living in the US. For years, Hubby had promised to take me to watch Broadway show at the Esplanade Theater in Singapore, because in the past, Broadway never came to Indonesia. The closest they had ever been to was Singapore. The promise never materialized because there have been no shows that I cared to watch just yet.

 

To my greatest delight, Ciputra - a very wealthy businessman and art lover - had built a theater with international standard here in Jakarta, and he had successfully invited Broadway New York to finally visit and perform in Indonesia during their world tour! No need to go to Singapore! And the show is Beauty and The Beast! AND I had been longing to watch Beauty and The Beast on stage live performance! So, naturally I told Hubby that for my birthday, all I wanted was two tickets - or even one ticket, if he didn't care to go with me - for that particular show.

 

He did get me two, and we went to watch the show together last weekend. The performance was great and magical and I had such a good time. It was a maginificent birthday present. Thank you, Hubby!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Through (Blue) Rose Tinted Glasses

Note: I finally succumb to the temptation and open an Instagram account! I know, I know, I'm so late, but better late than never, rite. Haha! The thing is, I usually don't have good internet or wifi connection, so uploading pictures on Instagram takes waaaayyyyy too long! But wifi is a little bit better now! If you'd like to know what's going on in my daily life, please find stylenseason on Instagram. ^__^

What do you think when you see these pictures?

An outing at the mall of Mommy and Baby...

A happy family of three...

Yes, it was a supposedly happy family outing at a nearby mall. We didn't take Baby Michael out that much because we prefer to wait until he got all his basic shots completed before taking him everywhere with us. Some people might think that's rather extreme, but that's what my Mom did with me when I was a baby, and Baby Michael had not had any sickness until about his ninth month. 

But anyway, what I was going to say is, right before we were out of the door, my husband and I had a big fight. 

Can you tell from the pictures? I don't think so. I posted these pictures in my social medias, and my friends made positive comments about our little happy family. All smiles and so.

Well, we did smile again when the picture was taken, but the five minutes drive to the mall was silent and awkward. My husband didn't say anything and I stubbornly gave him the silent treatment in return.

The funny thing is: I do not remember now what the fighting was all about, nor do I remember how we kissed and made up. 

What once felt like such a big a deal, turned out to be not that a big a deal after all.

Lesson learned? It was not our first fight. It's not going to be the last. But after a while, it didn't matter anymore. We kissed and made up. We forgave and forgot. We didn't discuss the fight. We just moved on. Afterall, if we had to discuss every single argument we'll ever have, we would spend all time in our marriage to do just that. When we can spend our marriage life to... well, to live. Like playing with our son. Flirting and cuddling with each other. Having dinner together. Telling jokes. Trying out new restaurants. You know, all those domestic bliss that doesn't look too glamorous, but leave you feel warm and snazzy and comfy inside. Waaaaay much better than discussing our arguments and disagreement all the time. After a while, we agreed to disagree, and moved on. And having a lot of fun and love and happiness along the way.

We CHOOSE to see our life in rose tinted glasses. It's not being delusional. It's called growing up and making decision to live and see life in positive note, instead of in negative one.

What we remember now, is that was a swell Sunday family outing. My son will not remember what clothes he was wearing, what he was eating, what we were doing, but he will remember that he had a wonderful childhood with a mother and a father who love him and love each other.

Always pick your battles wisely. Sometimes, it's not worth a battle at all.

Every single item I wore in these pictures are the black sheeps. Well? What does it mean?

The blue striped tee is something my Mom bought during one of her annual trip to the US, and she ended up not liking it. So she gave it to me. The skirt has been in my closet for about three years, unworn. It was sewn together out of several different older clothes, and I didn't have a clue what I was going to wear it with. 

The necklace. When I was going to buy it online, I didn't know how I was going to wear something so colorful and such a statement piece. Well, I'm sure if you're a regular reader you have seen this necklace in display many, many times. 

Same thing with this bag. None of my friends supported my decision to acquire this blue purse. 

Turned out that I like every single one of them! No regret in having them afterall!

Soft Coral N Pastel Mint

Note: I finally succumb to the temptation and open an Instagram account! I know, I know, I'm so late, but better late than never, rite. Haha! The thing is, I usually don't have good internet or wifi connection, so uploading pictures on Instagram takes waaaayyyyy too long! But wifi is a little bit better now! If you'd like to know what's going on in my daily life, please find stylenseason on Instagram. ^__^

Today's look is inspired by one of my favorite blogger from the Phillippines, Kryz, of Thirsty Thought by Kryz Uy at http://www.kryzuy.com/. She does work in fashion industry, so she's extremely fashionable, obviously. She wears a lot of looks that will not do in my life as a wife, mother of a baby boy, and a career woman in a conventional office, but she also wears a lot of fun and pretty combination that could be copied easily by throwing things that I've already had in my own wardrobe.

This is the original picture where I got inspiration from:

And this is my own version:

You might say "The two looks are completely different!" Well, yes and no. Her look is pairing lavender and mint. Mine is coral and mint. I would never thought to combine pastel on pastel if not because of her above picture. The skirt, by the way, was refashioned from one of my maternity dresses. ^__^

I browse through fashion blogs because I love to see beautiful things. Same reason for why I love to watch haul videos on YouTube. Some might argue that those bloggers or vloggers make a lot of money from sponsors and they have bad influence by sending the message of artificial beauty and materialism, but it's no the case for me. For most of them anyway. As long as those women only talk about fashion, I personally think that's OK.  If they start sending out messages like "It's OK to marry a man for reality show then divorce him after 70-something days" or "It's OK to get wasted and have sex then have babies outside of marriage" or "It's OK to yell at your mother or treating your husband like a loser"; like some popular "Keeping Up With Whoever" shows, THEN I would stop reading and watching. Being glamorous and being vulgar are two different things. Just my personal opinion. ^__^

Back to fashion, this is my version of ultra feminine pastel on pastel, chiffon on chiffon. I wore this to go to Church for Sunday mass. What do you think, Friends?

Mommy Friends N The Single Gals

I wrote this post after reading a post on tips about what to do when your friend just had a baby. I cannot find the post anymore, it seems the author had deleted it (?). Though I can understand where she was coming from, there are many points in there which I do not agree. The post basically asking SOOOO much from the no-baby friend and almost zero or even really nothing from the mommy friend. It's like "If you are my friend, you have to care about my baby. If you are my friend, you will love my baby. If you are my friend, you will be understanding that I'm busy now. Now that I'm married, I know who my friends really are! " Reading that, I was like "O mi gosh! If I were like that, I wouldn't wonder why single friends or married-with-no-children friends suddenly disappear from my life once I have a baby!"

Today I'd like to share with you all my married-with-children friends what I used to feel as a single woman about my married-with-children girlfriends who act like the writer of the aforementioned blog post. Frankly, I wouldn't dare to say these out loud were not I'm now a married-with-a-baby myself, for it might spark some misunderstandings or misconception, like I'm anti family or anti baby. And I don't mean to insult the blog writer, though I didn't mention her in this post. Everybody has their own opinion, and this is mine. This is a disclaimer that I don't mean to insult anyone! ^__^

I spent a lot of years as a single career woman who lived alone. I had been living on my own since I was eighteen, so yes, I know how it is. And now I'm a wife as well as a mom, so I also know how it's like on the other side of the fence.

Here are what I used to feel as a single woman towards several of my mommy friends (especially when they were new mommies) who suddenly became mommyzillas after having a baby.

• I'm still your friend. I still like you a lot. I haven't changed. You have. I will still like you and love you, Friend. 
• I care about you're being a wife and a mom. But my friend is YOU, not your baby, and not your husband. So please understand if I care to hear about what's going on in your life, but I'm not interested to hear hours of nonstop stories about your husband and your baby.
• Some people just don't like children, and I'm (was) one of them. Just because I don't (didn't) like children, it doesn't make me a monster. 
• For that reason, I'm not interested to listen to your stories over and over again about your baby's bowel movement and milk intake. 
• You think I'm leaving you because you're a Mommy? The reason I disappear is because you don't return my calls, you don't reply to my SMSs, and you keep saying 'no' to my invitation to hang out, if only for coffee. And I even offered to come over to YOUR house or the coffeshop in YOUR neighborhood - which will take me a ninety-minute drive from my place to yours -  at YOUR time of convenience so you don't need to make any special arrangement for your baby. And I didn't hear back from you.
• Saying that, it's just downright rude and it hurt my feeling. And by the way, is that what you're going to teach your child? To neglect your friend just like that? To not reply to her messages like she just doesn't exist?
• Communication and friendship is a two-way street. So after several attempts, I give up. If you miss me, you know my number and where to find me.
• Just because I'm single and you're a mom, it doesn't mean I have more time and less busier than you. I just happen to have other priorities. 
• If you're really my friend, you will make an effort to get in touch with me. I certainly did make an effort for you, many many times, and I tried to cater to your mommy schedule and situation. What effort have YOU done for our friendship?
• I know that with a baby and all, I would no longer be that high in your list of priorities. I understand. Really, I do. And I accept that. But instead of moving me to somewhere at the bottom of your priority list - which I'll completely understand because I would do the same thing if the situation is reversed -  it seems like you just scratched me off your list completely.
• Then one day, out of the blue, suddenly you call and invite me to lunch/coffee/dinner/girl's night out/whatever like RIGHT NOW and you expect me to drop everything and comply to your schedule, because "You don't have a child, you must have a lot of free time and flexibility!" No my dear, it doesn't work that way. I'm your friend. I'm not your convenient alternative or your last resort. 
• Don't ask me to stay late at work and do YOUR work or work on the holidays again for like the twentieth time with that lame, condescending, annoying, judgemental saying: "You're single. You have more time. We have children, so we need to be home for the holiday/dinner." OK, how much are you going to pay me then? I must be compensated because you asked me to sacrifice my time so YOU can have time with your family. AND you didn't even ask me nicely, or politely.
• You ask me to be understanding of your situation, which I did, do, a hundred times. What about you're being understanding to MY situation for once, for a change? Didn't you say that motherhood is the ultimate act of unselfishness? By treating your friends like that, don't you think it's just like doing acts of kindness ONLY to your family and doing completely selfish acts to your friends?
• And again, is that what you're going to teach your children on how to treat their friends? Only being friends when it's convenient?

And to my dear single Friends, I try to avoid doing all those things to you. If I ever did, I apologize. I really try not to be 'that' kind of married-with-children type of 'friend'. Even after my husband and Baby Michael, I do try to make time for my friends. Just because I have a baby. it doesn't mean I suddenly become unavailable. I can hang out. I can go to lunch. I can meet you for coffee. Even for dinner. All I'm asking is that you ask me in advance, because I need to make some arrangement for my baby. As a mother, I lose a lot of my time flexibility. But trust me, your once fun friend here, she is STILL here.

By the way, this is part of the email I wrote to the blog author after reading her post. 

Actually I wrote her an email with what I think, and here is some of what I wrote her. The email basically summarized my thoughts about this matter. I have to say here that she sent me a very kind and nice reply, so this post is definitely not attacking her or her post! ^__^  And I'm still subscribed to her because I love reading her blog. Anyway, here's what I said:

I'm a wife and a mother after being a single career woman for 30-something years, and I have to say that most of what you wrote rings a bell with my own situation! Ow, and one thing more: don't forget that we are a mother AND also a wife. The big baby needs attention, too!

However, I don't ask my friends to care about my child. Not everyone loves children. Some people naturally don't really care about children, except for their own. I'm the youngest child and I never dealt with any children before I had my own baby, so I could understand if some of my friends, though they care about me dearly, they are not that interested about my husband or baby. Mind you, they DO care about my marriage and my being a mom, though, and they DO want the marriage and the mommyhood work well, even great. See the difference? ^__^

Also, I'd like to add that your single and the married-with-no-children also need some consideration from their married-with-children friends. Yes, they need YOUR consideration and understanding, too. As a single girl, I was in many situation where my married-with-children friends were being so inconsiderate and treated me like a convenient alternative and everything had to go their ways, because "Hey, I'm busy being a wife and mother, and you are not!" And I also experienced many times when my mommy coworkers treated me for granted when I was single, asking me to do their work because "You single girls have more time than us busy moms!" (I refused down pat after several times) 

Come to think of it, we also know who our real friends are after THEY are married and have children. 

And for all mothers out there who still make time for your friends, here's to you! *thumbs up* 

And now I'm going out to have casual dinner with my girlfriends, and here is what I wear. ^__^

This Hermes-inspired purse was a birthday gift from my husband. He bought it on ebay, and I'm crazy about it! He was like: "I can't afford to buy you a real Hermes right now, so I hope this one will do for this year." Of course it does! I love it! Thank you, hubby! XoXoXo

Taking picture with Baby Michael before leaving. He didn't look happy that Mommy is leaving. ^__^ Don't worry, Son, Mommy will only be gone for two hours!

A Simple Gal's Journal: The Art of Doing Nothing

On the day I'm writing this...

In the morning...

The moment I opened my eyes, the first thought that came into my mind was: "Oh, thank God Hubby is here!" You might wonder why I thought that. For the past four days he had been coming home around three in the morning every night, and leaving the house at eight on the next morning. He was having a commercial shooting, and the shooting lasted from six in the morning to whatever hour it will take to finish. By the time he was home I was fast asleep, so I didn't hear coming in. It was good to open my eyes in the morning and see him laying next to me! 

Luckily, my husband was only supervising his team, so he didn't need to stand by at six. Therefore he still had time to play with our baby before the car picked him up to take him to the shooting location.

Today is Saturday... 

I had a lovely Saturday with my little family. Our yoga trainer came in the morning for our lesson, and as tired as my husband was, he was committed to do yoga class with me. He was the one wanting me taking yoga class for my health in the first place, since I'm not into exercising and going to the gym like him. I was too lazy to spend my Saturday for yoga class, but my husband insisted. Since my husband was still tired after the shooting, our instructor just made us do relatively easy and detoxifying exercise. It was really good and invigorating. I always feel cleansed and refreshed after yoga session. And hungry. All those sweats, gotta refuel!

For lunch...

I'm always famished after yoga session, so we had grilled pork, rice, and vegetables at a nearby diner. It was a simple restaurant in the neighborhood where the ambiance does not matter, you don't need to dress up, and returning customers basically just come (and pay) for the good, simple, hearty food. My kind of family style casual diner! It was not, of course, a healthy food to eat after a ninety-minute yoga class. To assuage my feeling of guilt, I sucked on a lemon afterwards. You know, to wash away all the pork fat out of my system. My husband basically laughed it off.

In the afternoon....

My husband spent some time playing with our son, then he went back to sleep. Poor man. He had not had enough sleep for days! I continued playing with our son until he fell asleep as well. The role division in our family is pretty clear and conventional. We both work outside the home. However, it is my husband's role as the breadwinner. I manage the household money, our investment, our home, and our baby. You know, the domestic matters. 

I love it. I love spending time researching for the right kinds of investments for our family and crunching numbers with my financial calculator. I'm very organized, frugal and responsible person, and my husband knows it. That's why he basically just let me take care all of our household money.

My husband also leave the house decorating to his wife. I love making our home looks pretty and homey. I love making seasonal centerpieces for our coffee table in the living room. I love arranging our cupboards and linen closet. I love nesting.

I also make sure that there's always good, nutritional food on the table, in the pantry, in the fridge, and in the kitchen. I follow my Mom's rule: "No one under my roof is ever going to be wanting of food." When I was little, I remember not having the best clothes or the best toys among other children, but when I came home from school there was always something simple yet delicious on the table for us to eat. We always had fresh bread and pastries in the cupboard and fresh fruit in the fridge. Sometimes as a treat we had ice cream and chocolates. I apply the same rule in my house now. And my husband, a big man as he is, with an appetite to match, just loves it.

So you see. The home and taking care of the children is my responsibility. My sweet husband helps, of course, but for example is he wants to watch TV or go out with his friends, I would be minding the dishes and cleaning the table. When our baby woke up at night and cried, I'm the one waking up to soothe him and making his bottle while my husband slept like a log. No complaint. We each have a different role. I don't want to be the family breadwiner, and he doesn't want to be a homemaker. So it works out beautifully.

In the evening...

My husband wanted to hang out after our son asleep. Usually our baby sleeps by eight thirty. But I guess he was still tired so we cancelled our plan and had dinner at home instead with homemade veggie soup and fried chicken wings. Then we thought we were having a movie night aka watching DVD after our son asleep, but lo and behold! My husband fell asleep again while I was tucking the baby in! Usually he played with our son before the baby's bed time, but I guess Daddy was just too tired tonight. 

So here I am typing this blog post about an ordinary Saturday of an ordinary gal. I hope you enjoy it as I enjoyed my day, though nothing special happened. Haha!

I cannot remember when I wore this ensemble, but it was definitely from my pre pregnancy. I think it was for lunch with some friends. I usually love clashing colors, but on that day I just wanted a rather monochromatic look.

I also wore this blue dress like this. For original post, please click here.

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