Showing posts with label motherhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label motherhood. Show all posts

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Why We (Finally) Send Our Two Year Old to School

When we had Michael, his father and I thought that we won't be the kind of parents who sends off their children to kindergarten when they can barely walk, or boast about their two year old who can write alphabet already. Well, we still are NOT that kind of parents, but we DO send our two and a half year old son to pre-kindergarten school.

Even though both me and Hubby work outside the home, Michael gets plenty of time with both his parents. Hubby plays with him in the morning since both boys are morning person who are up and about at five in the morning. I often drop home from work during lunch time to check on him and take him for a nap before going back to the office. I usually arrive home around 17.30 in the evening so I still have many hours to feed him, listen to him, play with him, talk to him, and wait for his father, who is usually home around 18.30.

Weekends are also family affairs. Hubby and I try to schedule our date dinners or lunch around Michael's nap or bed time so we can spend as much as time as possible together as a family. We also take Michael to Church to attend Holy Mass (read the post here) and I already taught him to pray before bedtime and mealtimes; and introducing him to my daily Bible reading.

So I thought, "What could they possibly teach in kindergarten that Michael cannot learn at home with his parents?" The answer: the interaction with other children.

As Michael is getting older, we realized one thing that we never put into consideration before: Michael doesn't interact much with children his own age. He only knows adults. Loving adults like his parents, grandparents, his childminder, our local helpers, aunts and uncles, who cuddle him, praise him, spoil him, bring him gifts, and let him get away with practically anything. Well, not his parents, we are quite discipline with Michael, but we cannot force other adults to be strict with our child, especially his grandparents.

Michael does play with other children sometimes. Children from the neighborhood whom he sometimes meet during morning walk or when he plays in the park, but that's it. And five-minute interaction is not really an interaction.



As he is growing older and smarter, we finally decided to send him to a pre-nursery program at a kindergarten school within walking distance from our home. Hubby and I know that many of our friends rack their brain looking for the "best" kindergarten for their child. They do lots and lots of trials, they research over the internet, parent discussion forms, asking a lot of questions about the teaching methods, etc.

Well, we are not that complicated. Our consideration in choosing Q-Kiddies - the kindergarten in our neighborhood - is quite simple:

It's within walking distance from home.
The place is clean and mosquito-free.
The teachers are patients with children.
Limited number of children per teacher.
The classmates are from "good" families. (If it sound incriminating, I bet all parents know what I mean.)
A lot of play as well as educational activities, no homework. (He is still two year old, he doesn't have to be able to read and write now!)
Last but not least, Michael likes the school and is willing to commit attending the class.

Plus point of Q-Kiddies, they teaches in English, so Michael will learn a second language in addition to Indonesian language. AND, the tuition, though not cheap, is not astronomical, either. And I am relieved to witness that the teacher washed the children's hands with hand sanitizer before coming in to class, and refused admittance of a child who is clearly very ill, coughing and sneezing. THAT is very important!

I wrote that we took Michael to visit the school one Saturday (read the post here). At the end of my recovery time, I brought him up again for class trial. Michael doesn't often wander outside, so he was quite shy at first. Thankfully, the teachers let me sit at the back of the class so he can see me. Several times, he will leave other children to sit on my lap, and gladly, the teachers just let him, until he feels ready to stand up on his own and rejoined his friends without anyone asked him to. His teachers didn't force him to come up or leave Mommy, they just keep including him in all activities, though other children sit with the teacher and Michael sits on Mommy's lap!  


 Michael has building blocks at home, but this time, he has to share with other children. ^__^


After a while, Michael was willing to sit near his teacher, or "Auntie", and let her help her with building blocks. The school limits the number of students to ten children maximum per class, that ensures the two teachers can pay sufficient attention to each child. It's like a family-style homeschool, which I really like, instead of over-commercialized schools.


He learns to sit still with other children and talk to friends.


He learns to show respect to others by keep quiet when the teacher is talking. We do teach that at home, but never with other children, since he is our first child.


He learns to write simple letters and hold pencil the correct way. He also learns this at home, but it's a completely different experience doing it with eight other children and compare his "writing" with others!





After an hour, the children go to the play room and have some fun! Again, I'm a strong believer that children need to be active physically, not just being cooped up in the classroom for hours!




He learns to wait for his turn. Something that will serve him right in life.


He learns that the world is much bigger than he's ever seen before.



We believe it's very important to - at some level - include Michael in making any big decision that will affect his life. So, after the initial class trial,
I asked him, "So, how was it? Do you like going to school?"
He said, "Yes, Mommy."
"Do you want to continue going to this school? If yes, then Mommy will pay for your tuition."
"Yes."
So I paid for registration fee, administration fee, and the first month tuition. Actually, parents should pay for a minimum of three-month period. However, I told the school that I would like to try for the first month first, just in case. Fortunately, they are quite flexible with my request.

So, my two-and-a-half year old goes to school twice a week now, for one and a half hour each session. He has attended two birthday parties, which is quite new to him, and he learned to bring - and give - presents to the birthday boy/girl. He likes the goodie bag he received, he likes learning drawing and writing, and he likes play time. Oddly enough, he refused to join his friends for singing and dancing, when in fact, at home he likes singing and dancing! I dropped him off to school in the morning, and he will walk home with his childminder at the end of class. When I got home from work in the evening, he will show me the class project he finished that day.

After the second class, he suddenly refused to go to school anymore! I gently asked him why, and he said "The Auntie is bad." His childminder explained that there was another teacher who wouldn't allow the childminder wait inside the classroom. Michael strictly refuse to cooperative until they let the childminder in. I know how strongwilled Michael can be - like his Mommy and Daddy, afterall - so on the third session I accompanied him to school and explained to the teacher that Michael is still new and perhaps the school will allow the childminder to join in - just sitting at the back of the class so she won't interrupt school activities - until Michael feels comfortable enough to come inside the classroom by himself? The teacher agreed.

Then I talked to my child.
"Do you want to come inside the classroom on your own today?"
"No."
"Do you want Nanny to come with you?"
"Yes."
"Then Nanny can come, but she has to sit at the back, OK? And promise Mommy you will behave during class. Yes?"
"Yes."
"Promise Mommy that you will learn to come inside the classroom by yourself after a while, OK?"
"Yes, Mommy."

So far, so good. The "bad Auntie" was extra nice to him that day and Michael is now happily goes to school again. I'm so thankful that the teachers at the school understand child psychology and are very patient. If not, school will be a traumatic experience for Michael, and we don't want that!

My baby is not a baby anymore. This is the first step toward the outside world for him. But even if I cannot always tag along with him for the rest of his life, Mommy's prayer will go with him wherever he goes. ^__^

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Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Week in Recap: Easter Care Package, Learning N Giving

 
This week...
 
I found this quote:
 
 
How many times have you felt that the world is so unfair since those who are obviously wicked and do bad deeds went unpunished, sometimes even thrived and unjustly rewarded - at least in monetary and recognition value - instead of others who obviously do good deed but went unnoticed because they're not good in self promoting? Too many times. How many times have you felt that all your good deeds were unrecognized and unappreciated? Again, too many times, I'm sure. It happened to me, too.
 
But remember, the thing is to be a good person, not proving that you are a good person. The Lord - who sees all - is not blind. Even if somethings it seems like He is not present in our everyday lives. He sees everything. Do good because you are good and because your Father in Heaven is good, not as a proof of your own goodness.
 
***
 
I realized that Michael is not so little anymore. I mean, hello, where did the baby go? Suddenly he grew so tall! Time does flies, as cliche as it might sound. On Saturday we visited a kindergarten where we plan to send Michael to. Michael is not old enough to enter kindergarten, but we want him to join some sort of preschool where he goes to a playgroup of ten toddler three times a week for ninety minutes, where he can socialize and play with children his own age. We are not the kind of parents who believe that children should be taught to read and write at a very young age. We believe that children should be active and play and do simple chores instead of being cooped up in classroom for hours. They can learn so much from such simple activities such as hand-eye coordination, motoric skills, manners, etc. However, we also realized that Michael lacks socializing with childen his own age. That's why we want him to join playgroup close to our house. It's within walking distance. Unfortunately, I didn't do enough research. We ended up at another children language center that is closed on Saturday. The kindergarten we were supposed to visit is located at the other side of the mall, but I didn't realize that. I phoned them again on Monday and made another appointment this coming Saturday.
 
 
 
Though sometimes I feel like Michael is no longer a baby, there are times I like to tell myself, "Well, he's is a baby, afterall!" At least when he talks he still sounds like one, hehehe... 
 
***
 
I was in the mood for doing spring cleaning and organizing, so I reorganized my purse, and divided the content of my purse into four small bags and pouches. I like using small pouches because it makes changing bags extra easy and you know where everything is. For example, if I'm looking for my phone, I know it's in my pink pouch. Wet wipes? The white flower pouch. House keys? In my pink bag organizer. The small trick helps a lot. No more rummaging around the huge bag looking for something.
 
 
I repurposed a Body Shop gift box from Christmas as body care container like this. I love repurposing things, especially containers, because I hate to waste the money to buy things as well as littering the environment with too many (cute) packaging. Nowadays, products and gifts come in pretty baskets and boxes, which in mind are perfectly okay to repurpose instead of keep buying new containers.
 
 
In this digital era, many people don't make photo albums anymore, because they keep all their pictures on computer. We have one album, which is our wedding album. After some pondering, I decided that the album did no good just sitting on the shelf gathering dust. So I took it down, wiped the dust clean, and put it on display on our living room coffee table. I created this photo album stand from a piece of company merchandise sample that is merely almost thrown away, which I decorated with these paper red flowers that came with a Christmas package.
 
Because the album is there for everyone to see, now Hubby and I remember to flip through it once in a while when we feel nostalgic. Michael loves to flip through it, too. The funny thing is, because he was not in the pictures, he said that he was "waiting in the car". He still doesn't understand that when his parents got married, he was not born yet. Guests are also welcomed to flip through the album, and it serves as a good conversation topic. Who knows, I might be inspired to create an album every several years or so and put it on display like this!
 
 
***
 
As parents, we try to guide Michael as well as we could. For example. how to be brave and try all sorts of games by himself (with our supervision, of course). And if he falls down, we encourage him to try again, but "Next time, be more careful!"
 
 
We taught him about grocery shopping and the value of money. He even created a game of ATM machine, mimicking me taking out cash from the ATM! So many things can be taught and learned doing grocery shopping with a child. We taught him to only buy things that we need, put those UHT chocolate milk back on the shelves because he's already got many at home, and we taught him to help carry a bit of the groceries.
 
 
Michael learned that he should not be selfish and only buy things for himself. I told him, "Let's buy some bananas for Daddy!" and that's what he did putting in the bananas inside the shopping cart! "It's for Daddy!" he said.
 
 
In addition to learning how to haul and navigate a shopping cart, Michael also learned that he should wait patiently and guard the cart when Mommy was inspecting other produce.
 
 
Of course, when I do my biweekly grocery shopping, I go alone! I only carry Michael along when go shopping within walking distance from home to buy some neccessities that we ran out and it's not time yet to go for "real" grocery shopping. I schedule my grocery shopping twice a month, because the more frequent I go, the more money I tend to spend. For fresh produce, since they won't last two weeks, I buy additional vegetables from street sellers and this nearby grocery store.
 
***
 
Learning is not only for children. It's a lifelong process for us to grow continuously. Education doesn't stop at school, and it's not only about math, language, and science. You might know that one of my job is managing our Penthouse floors and in-house apartment. I have a team graduated from some of the well-known three-star, four-star, and five-star hotels in town. It's a good opportunity to learn some practical skills used in running a hotel that can be applied at home, such as housekeeping, pantry inventory system, fancy coffee making, etc. Last week, I had a bit of free time before going home, so I asked one of the girls to teach me to fold napkin for fancy dining. It took me a while, but I finally was able to make my own masterpieces. Here they are! I love entertaining at home, and next time when I do, I can add a little bit of fancy touch with my own newly-acquired fancy napkin folding skill! Thank you, Sandy! From left to right first row: fleur elis, Padang house, cove. Second row: Sydney, fan, and candle. I might be a career woman with my own track record, but I am still a homemaker at heart, and I love learning new skills that I can carry with me for many many years to enhance and beautify my home. ^__^
 
 
As a relatively new mom, I also learned one thing about this little human being I called my son. I think I have shared with you how a human being recognized beauty from a very early age, but I got yet another confirmation last week. Michael loves music and watching nursery rhymes on YouTube, and I let him indulge once in while. Once he asked to play the song "You Are My Sunshine" and since there was a new video that I wanted to watch first, I played this song titled "Love Story" by a beautiful Japanese singer Namie Amuro. She is a beautiful woman with small stature, powerful voice, and long thick mane of hair. I expected Michael to protest, instead he watched unblinking, mesmerized by Namie Amuro's lovely voice, pretty face, fabulous ballad song, and luxurious long hair. Michael likes women with long hair, perhaps because Mommy has long hair. After the song ended, I asked him, "Isn't she gorgeous?" And his answer was a definite yes.
 
 
Michael has a neighbor friend, Emily, who is a pretty child with shy demeanor. She is three years old, a year older than Michael. One afternoon, Hubby and I took Michael to play the swing at the park and we were joined by another little girl named Michelle. She is also three years old, but being a tall toddler, Michael is just as tall as she is. Actually, Michael is the tallest two year old among our neighborhood, people always assume he is three years old, until they hear him talk. An interesting story, we asked Michael when we walked home, "Isn't Michelle pretty?" Michael answered, "She is." Then I asked him again, "Who is prettier? Emily or Michelle?" And Michael answered again, "Emily is prettier."
 
Now, don't get me wrong. I don't intend to teach my child to judge a girl by her look alone. As precious as beauty is, it does fade away. What surprised me was, even a two year old can make such a distinctive comparison and preference. As a mother, I learned new things continuously which remind me again and again, as small as a child is, he is a full, different, separate human being. He is not an extension of yourself. He is an independent human on his own.
 
 
***
 
Being a 37 years old mom, and as skinny as I was before giving birth, my body shape changed. I'm naturally small boned, but I have gained some extra weight for the past year. Most of my jeans no longer fit me, and I need several pairs of comfy, stretchy, lightweight pants to wear for our upcoming summer vacation. So I went online and bought this pair of mint pants. They only cost about five bucks and turned out to be a good buy. The material is extremely lightweight - perfect for travel -, they are comfortable to wear, and the color is very pretty. I plan to give this pair a try out for several wears before making decision to buy some more pairs in different colors.
 

I wish I could get my old body shape back, because my skinny frame used to be able to carry many many styles of clothes, but hey, let's get everything into proportion, shall we. I'm not a celebrity who makes a living from my look. I can get away looking like a real mommy and a woman almost 40, as long as I don't let myself go completely. There are more other important things in life that deserve my attention than trying too hard to lose weight: God, family, home, work, reading a good book, preparing a healthy meal, decorating my house, hanging out with friends and family, writing a post for this blog, walking through the park on a sunny day, drinking tea with my husband, ...
 
Irregardless, I still love to maintain my look. Haha! This is one of those selfies I sometime take to send to my husband at work. He loves to see his wife looking presentable everyday.
 
 
 
***
 
I have an auntie who lives alone. She has been having numerous hard times and trials for the past several months, and she was rather depressed about it. I thought I wanted to do something to cheer her up a bit. Easter basket is not a common thing here in Indonesia, but I thought I would prepare some sort of care package, an Easter gift basket if you will, for her, just to show that I care about her. She lacks nothing, and I don't want to give her "yet another thing that requires dusting"; so I bought some new things and gather several things around that house that I thought she might enjoy and won't create clutter at her house. Some girlie thing that she can actually use.
 
A bottle of shea body lotion. A new house dress in cheerful yellow color. A baby blue silk scarf with lovely flower pattern that is extremely soft to touch. Some necklaces - because I remember that her favorite accessories are necklaces. A fancy gold metal belt that she can wear to the office. She loves to read, so I gave her two books: one is one of my favorite reads - The Red Tent - a historical fiction based on a passage in the Bible. I have one myself and when I saw another one at a used book store, I snatched it, intended to give it as a present to someone who enjoy reading, though at that time I had no idea whom I would give it to. Hubby suggested a funny book titled My Stupid Boss. It's a collection of hillarious stories about life at the office that I bought for my own Boss - just for the humor of it. The later book is not new. I have one and Hubby also had one, so I gave his extra copy for Auntie. I hope it can make her laugh because the stories are quite funny and entertaining.
 
Preparing a gift basket or a care package is so much fun! I might write a separate post about this topic later on. 
 
 
***
 
Last but not least, happy belated Easter from our family to yours! Here's a picture of the three of us after Easter Sunday Mass. As you can see, Hubby wore a nice handpainted batik shirt with jeans and a pair and shoes, which made me quite thrilled because usually he prefers casual look with sandals! That's my Easter present, I guess, seeing him (a bit) dressed up for Church.
 
And no, none of us wore new clothes for Easter Sunday. We wore good clothes, but not brand new. We didn't feel like we needed purchasing yet another new things to celebrate Easter. After all, Jesus Christ has made us all new with His death and ressurection, hasn't He? ^__^
  
 
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