The Traditionally Human Nature: A Peanut Forgetting Its Shell

There is an old Indonesian saying: "A peanut who forgets its shell". It means a person who has risen up to power, fame or wealth, then let all of those supposedly good blessings get into his head, turn him into a snob and arrogant person, make him forget that afterall, he is still a mere mortal.

Over the years, on TV, on the news, in the history books, all around me, I learned that it's actually human nature to have this "peanut forgetting its shell" tendency.
Well, let's see.

From history books, we read that over thousands of years, mighty kings, rulers, emperors, pharaohs, rose and fell. Now read today's news. It still rings true today.

We learned about the famous sirens, queens, and courtesans of the past, the magnificent women who captured the hearts of powerful men and twisted them around their pretty little fingers: Cleopatra, Cora Pearl, Sophia Baddeley, etc. What happened to them at the end of their days? Now look at today's celebrities. Especially YOUNG celebrities. Some of them who are famous just for being famous. Sometimes their only claims of fame is just a leaked sex tape.

There are still many more examples.

Question: how many of these supposedly blessed people, when they are at the top, still can maintain their true sense of self? Maybe not many. Or maybe there are more than we thought. Nevertheless, in my personal humble opinion, it is a very difficult task.

It's so easy to judge. Whenever I read a piece of news about the most recent Lindsay Lohan's act, I'm tempted to think smugly: "If I were at her place, I'd never do something so stupid. She's young, and beautiful, and talented, and rich, yet she's so self destructive. Who needs a drink when one has what she has?"

Well, of course, if I were at her place, perhaps I'd be just as confused as she is. When you are at the top of the mountain, the view looks very beautiful indeed. But at the same time, everything you see becomes surreal and blur. You cannot see clearly that there are rocks and puddles and deep holes and traps down there.

Let's see in a much smaller scale. Let's say in my case, at work place. Since the very first day of my professional career, I've been taught these two golden rules: "Rule number one: the boss can do no wrong. Rule number two: if the boss is wrong, see rule number one."

Well, if you are a working girl like me, you will know what I mean. Anyone with subordinate, whether only one or one hundred thousand, will have this tendency to think that he or she is always right. Why? Well, look at the rule. More often than not, a boss, especially if he or she is a charismatic leader, will be surrounded by "yes men" or "yes women". When you are the boss, these 'yessers' will agree to everything you say, right or wrong. If you say that the cat is blue, they will nod. If you say the sky is green, they will say yes, indeed the sky is green. If you say "I want your lunch!", they will give them to you and will do without eating.

Another scenario. Let's say, later when I become a wife and a mother. There's a saying: "If Mama ain't happy, ain't no one happy." Also this one: "Happy wife, happy husband." Well, if that's so, how easy it would be for me to get convinced that what I think and what I want is the best for the whole family? When perhaps the whole family want other things, but won't say a word because they just want Mommy to be happy! What does my husband want, really, really want? Perhaps all the time he only complies with what I want! Now, THAT is dangerous!

I really love these little heart-shaped earrings! They make me smile...

I thought about this long and hard, and I realized, that I myself, at some point, has been in both positions. For example, if I disagree with my boss, I would take very great measure to say it in the most pleasant and polite way. If he snaps, well, forget about it, I will just shut my mouth and let him be. And I did that to my boss, there is a great possibility that my subordinates also defer to me in a similar way. And if it is so, how do I know when I'm doing something wrong, when everyone around me always nod their heads in unison and agree that I'm right and tell me how smart I am?

Well, there is also a saying: "A nail that stucks up will be hammered down." It means, if you don't want to get hammered down, you'd better lay low with all the other nails. There are times when I really want to stand up tall and straight and shout from the rooftop: "You're wrong!" However, I also know that sometimes, it is wiser to be silent and wait. Wait for what? For the right moment to speak up, of course! Afterall, there is also a saying in the Bible:

"There is an appointed time for everything."

(Ecclesiastes 3:1)

The world is not always in black and white. Forcing your way to rightness on everybody else is missing the point entirely.

And if you happen to be at the top, or in somehow superior positions, what can you do? What can I do?

"As special each and every one of us is, we, afterall, are mere mortals. We were born naked. We make mistakes. We get sick. We grow old. We were made of dust, and someday, you, me, all of us, will return to dust."

And that's a very humbling thing to remember. Thank you, Lord, for reminding me of that today.

Batik shirt (tucked in): Barata Batik (pesisiran batik). Black wrap skirt: tailored. Taupe swing jacket: DKNY. Red heart-shaped earrings: Claire's Store (USA). Red obi belt (worn backwards): Mom's (vintage). Copper-color purse: Guess (thrifted, an ex coworker sold it to me). Copper-color heels: Yongki Komaladi. Bracelets: Shanghai

Linking up to:

A Delightful Gift

Please meet my new friend: Shaun The Sheep.

Isn't he just pure adorable? He claims to be the darn cutest thing in this whole building of an office, and I cannot deny it! He's just so cute!

A collague from Procurement Department gave it to me as a present, and the moment I saw him I just fell in love.

Look, he can even do yoga! Hahaha!

He's sexy looking from the back, also! He's so soft and pudgy and cuddly, whenever I feel stressed out, I just use squeeze his belly like a stress ball. Ouch!

At the moment he's sitting on top of my CPU with his friend Lawry The Cow, which I got from Lawry's Rib & Steak Restaurant in Singapore during Christmas break. Don't they just make a cute couple or what!

I don't purpopsedly buy dolls or stuff toys then use them to decorate my desk like some of the younger girls here. However, when colleagues give me dolls, of course I would show off their token of love with pride!

This Starfish doll I keep in my car, it was a gift from a friend from HR.

You know, I work mostly to pay the bills, just like most people, and also for self improvement. But when you have such nice and thoughtful colleagues, it's quite a blessing that makes the long working hours fun and good for the heart! Don't you think so, Friends?

By the way, I had one commenter said that's it's unprofessional to take pictures at work. Well, I don't know about that. It could be yes and no. Definitely I don't want you Friends to think that I spend hours and hours taking pictures at the office. It takes me about two minutes to snap 6-8 decent pictures (yes, I timed it), and that's it. I work at the back office where the atmosphere is quite casual since we don't meet clients or external parties on that particular floor, so nobody minds as long as I get all my work done well and keep everything anonymous. ^__^

Fying Home Part 2: Similar Yet Not Exactly The Same

As promised, here's another way of how I styled my outfit for flying. I wore the same skinny jeans, outer layer, wedges, bag and accessories like I did here, but with different top. Which one do you think is best, Friends? The yellow-purple, or the nude-purple?

Outer layer: Cotton On. Nude sweater. Skinny jeans: F21. Wedges: unbranded. Earrings: online. Necklaces: Warna. Purse: Les Catino.



Speaking of casual clothing, I was contacted by http://www.very.co.uk/ to write a sponsored post about their jumpsuit a.k.a romper products. At first I hesitated since rompers or jumpsuit or playsuit remind me of baby clothing! But then I browsed through their site and changed my mind. I never realized that jumpsuit could be so versatile, and feminine, too! Take a look at these...

For walking along the beach in the summer.

 For casual days.

 For evenings out.

Here's an article they sent me about the advantages and disadvantages of jumpsuits.

The Advantages And Disadvantages Of Jumpsuits

Jumpsuits – you either love them or you hate them. But whatever your feelings are about jumpsuits, we cannot deny that this funky item of clothing has really rocked the world of fashion recently.

Having been dubbed as this year’s alternative to dresses, jumpsuits – which are sometimes referred to as playsuits – are becoming an essential part of the summer wardrobe for more and more people.

If you are deliberating whether or not to plunge for this daring and ultra-trendy one-piece garment then you may want to check out the following advantages and disadvantages of jumpsuits.

An Easy Outfit Option

One major advantage of playsuits is that, because they are made of one piece of material like a dress, you don’t have to worry about matching clothes as you do with skirts and tops or trousers and tops.

Flattering and Slimming

Perhaps the biggest advantage of jumpsuits is that they are flattering to almost every body shape, and not only this but they are actually slimming as well.

In possessing an unbroken line from the neck towards to the feet, jumpsuits can give a slimming impression and, not only this, they can also hide a multitude of bulges, cellulite and other body sins on their journey from the neck downwards.

From women with pear-shaped figures who don’t like to emphasise the bottom, to plus-size women who like to cover up, jumpsuits make a stylish and flattering option of clothing for almost all body types.

Comfortable

In being a continuous piece of fabric, jumpsuits are usually extremely comfortable to wear and not only this but they can be put on and removed very quickly.

Versatile

Whether you want a casual day walking around a market or a late night clubbing, jumpsuits can cater for multiple occasions. Simply dress this funky garment down with a pair of sandals, flip-flops or other flats, or dress it up with a pair of killer heels: the choice is yours!

Practicality

One of the only disadvantages of the jumpsuit is that practicality can be comprised at times – such as when the need to take a trip to the ladies’ is urgent.

Fit

When we buy skirts, jeans, trousers and tops we can mix and match these items so that we find the best fit. Jumpsuits on the other hand have to fit the whole body and can therefore be restrictive for women with less proportionate bodies.

So, would you wear jumpsuit a.k.a. playsuit a.k.a romper?

Flying Home

Thank you, All, for your kind and encouraging words on my previous post. Really, really, appreciate it.

Some time in May, here in Indonesia we had a super-long four-day weekend. I decided to fly to my hometown to visit my parents for the holiday. My husband followed after two days, he's so sweet, he said that I should have some time alone with my parents without having to worry about him. Eventhough, I think he regretted it when he realized that he was going to spend half of the long weekend alone. :)

For flying, I tend to follow these following outfit "rules":

Wear something comfortable.

You're going to be walking fast down the long airport alleys, strolling a luggage, then sitting idly for several hours inside an airplane. Unless you're a celebrity for whom looking glamorous at all times is a must, I think it's just practical to wear something comfy that enable free and easy movement. Nothing too tight, nothing too short, no stilettos. Therefore I wore this baggy tee and stretchy skinny jeans. Wedges are the best shoe option if you want comfort and style at the same time, I wore a pair that are not too thick-soled.

Prepare an extra layer.

For obvious reason. The inside of an airplane is notoriously cold. Short distance flights do not include blankets, so bring a jacket, a sweater, or a shawl, especially if you cannot stand cold temperature like me.

Avoid metal accessories.

Remember that you'll be passing through several security metal detectors, and you don't want extra delay because your chunky metal necklaces, bracelets, and heavily studded metal belt (or metal tip boots) make those annoying beeping sound.

When traveling, wear or bring accessories or outfits that could be mixed and matched.

I only brought one pair of earrings and wore the same bead necklaces during the four-day weekend. You don't want to bring too much stuffs. In my next post I'll show how I styled my other airport ourfit worn during my journey back to Jakarta.

Dressing comfy doesn't mean dressing frumpy!

Why do you think I opted for this cheerful yellow and purple ensemble? Comfy outfits can look polished and stylish at the same time.

On the side note, I'm still trying to find the best location at my new place to take pictures. Here's the best spot I could come up with, at least up till now. My husband is a sucker for movies, so we invest in home theater electronics to enable us having movie nights at home. We could just snuggle up on the sofa, have some snacks, and watch DVD without even leaving the living room. Cheap date!

 I'm too lazy and busy to hold a proper manicure. But pedicure is not so high maintenance, so I always wear toe nail polish. The pop of color make my feet look much more well groomed.

Yellow tee: Banana Republic. Skinny jeans: F21. Bag: Les Catino. Earrings: bought online. Necklaces: Warna. Wedges: unbranded. Outer layer: Cotton On.

Though It's Not St. Patrick's Day

The roof leaks, the water stops running, I have no steady internet connection, and the light at the study room is out. That's the "fun" of living in a house. It's no house play game afterall.
Still, I knew what was coming. One thing about getting married in a relatively mature-enough age as I do: I know and accept the reality that as beautiful as marriage can be, maintaining it, AND maintaining a house, and a HOME, will involve a lot of hardwork.
I now live in a smaller house, and have a two-hour commute everyday instead of a 20-minute one, which my body is still adjusting. I now do house chores when in the past I had people taking care of the house for me. I now manage a financial budget for two persons instead of one. But no, I don't believe that all those changes and additional work need to get in the way of that little thing called LIFE.

So, I still dress up everyday. I still (try to) create blog posts whenever possible. I still clean. I pay our bills and insurance. I keep my little monthly goals. I keep seeing my friends. I call my parents once a week. I make my husband his daily cup of milk and honey. I do my weekly hair spa at home, as I always did. In summary: I don't make change as a poor excuse for living life less than my usual standard. Because excuses, my Friends, 99% of time are just the way of saying: "I am just plain too lazy to do it."

For despite everything, over the years, through several rebellious and difficult years, I have learned to console myself in not-so-easy times by reciting this verse:

"I am confident of this, that the one who began a good work in you will continue to complete it until the day of Christ Jesus." (Philippians 1:6)

So, I'm just doing my part with dilligence (or as dilligent as I could manage, hehehe...), and He will be the one who'll complete it!

Earrings and purse: thrifted. Lacey tank top: unbranded. Black layer: Cotton On. Black slacks: LOFT. Green top: forgot the brand. Red obi belt: Mango. Necklace: bought online. Bracelets: gift and old collection.

Linking up to:

Lavender Rose

Having been living on my own since I was 18, it's a huge difference now that I live with a roomate, a.k.a my husband. Husband? Aw!! I have to admit, I'm not used to that word yet. Marriage is everything I expected to be. I didn't expect a rose tinted world. I expected hard work, a lot of compromises and sacrifices, respect, financial planning, and of course: love and forgiveness. Tons of forgiveness.

There were times when I go back to my old house to pick up my remaining possessions, and I just wanted to cry. I had such a great time living there, it's so hard for me to give up my single life. Fending for myself for years was not easy, but at least I lived it MY way back then.

A dear friend said to me: "Of course, since you've been living on your own terms for so many years, you need a lot of space. A lot of privacy. Right now you're feeling like you're being choked. But it's a step. I took that step too, and I would say, up till now, that I enjoyed single life much better. BUT, if I have to do it all over again, I would have done the same thing. Because despite everything, it's all worth it and I wouldn't want it any other way. You would, too."

Amen to that!

Luckily, my husband is very understanding about my great need for solitude, so he gives me my much needed "me time" this evening. He has arranged to have dinner delivered to our house (I'm still new to this area, I don't even know where to order food), then he's going out and have dinner with some of his college friends. That way, I have several hours of time to blog, catch up on my reading, read the Bible, and organize my accessory boxes.

Thank you, Hubby!

Striped top: unbranded. Lavender flower pin: DIY. Skirt: tailor made, refashioned with black lace to make it a bit longer. Obi belt: DIY. Earrings: Naughty Stores. Purse: Guchi. Shoes: Yongki Komaladi. Jacket: tailot made.